Posts Tagged ‘teaparty’

Road change you can believe in.

It takes a cool hand to fool the American people, and we know just the man to do it. Introducing Cool Hand Barack…

What we’ve got here is… failure to communicate. Check this out…

Obama Signs Border Bill to Increase Surveillance
President Obama signed into law a $600 million bill on Friday August 13th to pay for 1,500 new border agents, additional unmanned surveillance drones and new Border Patrol stations along the southwest border.

Sounds pretty nifty, huh? Folks finally getting what they want, and passed by congress on their vacation. Serious change and all of that.

When I heard this, the old 60 watt light bulb clicked on about six inches above my noggin. So why would Obama eagerly snap up legislation that he has shown a reluctance to address, what with his pressing vacation schedule and all? I have the answer, but first let me tell you a little about a strange phenomenon in Alabama.

In Alabama, our roads aren’t too bad most days. It could be because of the comparatively mild winters. You won’t find ice scrapers or tire chains in Alabama, and the roads rarely, if ever freeze down to the dirt.

Even so, roads do wear out, and when that happens, we expect a new coat of pavement. However, in Alabama, our roads only get paved every four years or so in the last couple of months leading up to ‘lection day.

It’s an old southern tradition. Perhaps it is done by incumbent politicians to aid the voting folk to be able to get to the polls without having to dodge potholes. How thoughtful! And while the voting folks (volksvoter) are voting, maybe they will appreciate their shiny new roads so much that they’ll vote for the incumbent what brung em to the voting booth.

At least that is the theory, and it has been practiced for as long as I can remember. Even back in the day, the pols would see to it that the chain gangs would lay down a fresh new layer of tar gravel.

I make a prediction. I will predict that between now and ‘lection day, our dear President Obama, may he be blessed 72 times, will more and more do things you like. Why, were it up to him, even your newborn babies would be born fully clothed!

You watch carefully. You’ll see your roads, whatever they may be, abundantly laid with a new mane of tar gravel so magnificent that you’ll jes naturally want to thank the incumbents what brung it to you.

At least, that’s the theory. Don’t be fooled. Even de man wid no eyes can see through that. He’s a tough old boy.

A Stern Warning to the Republican Leadership

The two parties, Democrats and Republicans are nothing alike. However, politicians are alike.

More times that I can remember, I have seen passionate Republicans argue important issues forcefully, and then, immediately, at the conclusion of the vote, win or lose, shut everything down just like turning off a water spigot.

As a passionate Tea Party advocate, representing a whole lot of people who feel just like I do, this time around, you do so at your own political peril.

There is nothing else so important as repealing this healthcare monstrosity. For the Republican leadership, this must be the beginning, not the end, for we know that by Obama’s very words, this is but the beginning of a string of socialist legislation that he and his minions will propose.

You are tasked with holding the line, gentlemen. You must hold until the troops arrive in November. The country, in peril, demands it of you!

Ingredients:

• 4 to 6 democrat lamb loin chops, about 3/4 to 1-inch thick
• salt and pepper
• 1/3 cup orange marmalade
• 2 tablespoons lemon juice

Preparation:

Place liberal lamb on an oiled broiler rack. Broil for 6 to 7 minutes on one side. Season with salt and pepper; turn. Broil on the other side for about 5 minutes, or until almost cooked to desired doneness. Season second side with salt and pepper. Combine the marmalade and lemon juice; spread evenly over the liberal lamb chops. Broil for about 2 minutes longer.
Serves 4 to 6.

Comments: This is one of my very favorite sheep recipes! Remember, it’s best to use em fresh like I do. You just lead them all into a dark caucus room and soften em up so they’ll cook up nice and tender. Who said you couldn’t make a silk purse out of a sheep’s ear? I do it all the time, laughing all the way to the dinner table. Sheep, it’s what America is eating for dinner.

Contributed by Barry Obama